wpheader
Writer_Jang

Samantha Jang

Author

Graphic_Pielago

Nicole Pielago

Graphic Artist

To My Stars, Sun, And Sky

Facebook
Email
Print

I’ve learned a lot, after all these years of drifting afloat in this abyss. The galaxy is vast and unclear, yet unexpectedly beautiful. All because of the heavenly bodies that adorn it with their luminous glow. Yet, it beholds a dark, sullen path which I once had overcome with my fellow stars. They’ve granted me everything; they opened my eyes and snapped my senses to feel the bliss I failed to see. All of them were beautiful, stunning, and one of a kind. I’ll admit that I’ve even kept traces of their glistening stardust to rouge my face, and conceal the scars that mark it.

However, I often found myself in moments where my stars just seemed too far out of reach. The ghastly orbit would plummet me to the murkiest corners of its fallen realm, and I’d find myself lost in its curse. I would’ve easily avoided it if only the force of gravity attached to my wings wasn’t all that tight, thereby leaving me hungry for a taste of freedom. Nonetheless, I was well aware that no amount of desire would be enough to break these iron chains.

As time passed, my body was left to ache, and my soul grew too weak to fly. It almost seemed as if my cries were released only for the deathly space to engulf my calls and swallow my tears. Well, that’s what I had thought at least. It was a horrid belief I forcefully spent centuries living by.

Well, that was until I met her.

 In fact, she was the very first to prove that point false. The blurred reflection of my fogged spectacles had coincidentally taken their glance at her golden daring eyes. 

The universe saw her as a star, far and bright,

while I saw her as my Sun.

Beforehand, my emotions slowly lost their cause while my despair slowly consumed me. I was at my absolute worst. 

That was until I heard her call out my name. She said as if it was a song – a blissful chorale perhaps. Her voice was like a flame softened by the wind: husky and fierce, yet gentle and fair. The subtle warmth she emitted cradled my body as her presence filled the air, despite our awfully spacious distance. The bitterness that once controlled me had deteriorated, piece by piece. It was her who inspired me to be the strong, fruitful woman I had longed to be.

Time seemed to grow tiresome and infinite, yet I still patiently waited for our orbits to collide.

The universe grew brighter as she drew close, where I’d have a clearer glimpse of her lovely aura as I’d drift near, as we’d drift and venture through the mysteries of the sky, making it our own stage to dance on. 

 My heart grew restless as I eagerly longed to see my sweetheart in person and introduce her to my darling stars. The tint of her light brought a glistening spark on my skin that was once lifeless and dull. Her heavenly aura had become part of me, as it glowed stronger for each step I took to reach her. I honestly still had fear stored upon my chest, yet her image empowered me with hope since I had the idea of meeting my sun and stars once more. 

Suddenly, the darkness that once controlled me had shriveled up and became one with the beaming light we made. She reached her hand out and kissed my calloused fingers, and . . .

My worries trembled as I felt her loving embrace. She had thin, airy braids that flowed like the tides I once tamed. Her delicate fingers swept through my complexion, while her fierce yet innocent glance met my eyes. She looked at me with her eyelids creased and a wide smile resting on her face, and at a sudden blink of an eye, her sweet lips met mine, and we kissed as if there was no tomorrow. We spent our precious time singing songs: she’d strike the keys of her gold rimmed piano while I’d pluck the strings of my silver barred lute, as we composed melodies that we sang before we slept. Her delicate hands held my calloused fingers while we danced to the eclipse’s lullabies. 

Little did we know that this connection would soon come to an end.

I’ve never had a month fly by so fast. The cruelty of time left us weeping as our orbits pushed us away. We didn’t even get to say our goodbyes nor to hold our last dance. Her amber tears flowed as mine hardened to stone. Our cries were heard throughout the galaxy as our bodies grew farther away. The life I have darkened once more, after an eternity of waiting for a beam of light to come.

I later found myself back home. The place I had once lived and worked at before I had a taste of how bitterly bland loneliness can possibly be. I was back to this nostalgic, peaceful state where fellow stars danced, yet this time their melodies didn’t sound the same. Every note of the town’s country organ had struck me like the thunder that accompanied the waves I had always tirelessly soothed, as I remembered what I’ve lost and surrendered to its curse once again.

After slowly taking my time to heal, I decided to fly out and meet my stars again. Some greeted me with the same unconditional love, some changed, while others had perished or cut me out of their lives. Coming back to all of this had enlightened me yet left me deeply wondering.

Did my stars see me as something bright, someone they could look up to or rely on? Did I help them as much as they had helped and taught me? Was I a good influence or such?

Did my sweetheart see me as her darling sun too? Did she get to taste the butterflies and ecstasy her care had spoiled me with? Did I give her the love she showed in her actions and her daring eyes?

Or, was I nothing but a mere asteroid who was nothing but a bother to them? An obstacle?

It is embarrassing to admit, but no amount of time has strengthened me to live alone. It was either the company or the memoir of my loved ones that kept me going forward. Drifting through my challenges alone had taught me a lot, but was all that pain worth its shallow price? 

No, not at all.

Everyone goes through difficult times in their lives, no matter how joyful or rich it may seem at first glance. People often tell themselves that they have to face these obstacles alone since the battles one has to overcome and face are often unclear and biased. You are just like me, but you can do better than I did. Call your stars as loud as you can; don’t let your fear engulf the beauty that your pain and worries are blinding you from. Peers can be difficult, but there is someone amongst the seven billion people on your chaotic little planet who is willing to give you the guidance you need. 

Companionship is a necessity; there are instances where you’ll find yourself on the verge of surrender. Requesting for help doesn’t make you weak – it proves your courage and will to grow, yet that’s often overseen just because the price of one’s assistance or time seems too much to pay for. But don’t forget, you hold more than enough power to be someone’s star and sun. If you ask me, that’s worth more than you can ever imagine. Perhaps you may not be aware of the heavenly glow you emit, my dear one.  

I wish you the best of luck with your orbit – please wish me the best as I learn how to overcome mine, so I can treat and bond with my stars and reach my Sun once more. Her light is a part of me now; I can still feel her love from this distance. Along with the stardust that has rouged my dented cheeks I’ll get there, and you will, too. I know you will.

Love, Moon